Just wondering...

I think I shouldn't be so... low? I don't know what the word is for that. What I mean is that I don't think I should be so modest. It's stopping me from succeeding in quite about everything. I lack the confidence.
Yes, I might seem like a very active and daring person, but I really ain't. I'm socially active, but not ambitious enough.
Today I discovered it in a quite unexpected way.
I got really angry at a certain person. Most will never see what I do when I'm angry, as there's only 2 people that can considerably disturb me.
Anyways, when it was over once again I noticed, that my voice is a lot closer to bass. I also had less trouble with pronouncing some letters that I usually can't pronounce very well in English.
I really should get a voice recorder... Then I could really know how I sound. Currently I simply don't know and thus may sometimes be hard to understand.

The love of my life!

I would of never thought that I could play an instrument any time near, but fate plays tricks on us I guess. Guitars are amazing! I got my hands on one at my girlfriend's place yesterday. I couldn't do much, but it was awesome. I have tried piano, flute and a few other instruments, but with this guitar I really felt that it's for me. And i felt that I improved fast within the next few hours.
I am definitely getting a guitar someday. Someday soon.

Also, I am once again returning to the same music that I used to listen to a few years ago. This one is quite good in my opinion:

Guitar is now the love of my life.

Estonian

See on seni ainus eestikeelne postitus ja nii see ilmselt ka jääb.
Minu kohta, et:
Ma olen 16-aastane poiss. Äärmiselt rahulik ja vist ka maheda häälega(ise määrata on keeruline).
Mul ei ole vähimaidki eelarvamusi soo, vanuse, religiooni ega millegi muu taolise suhtes.
Ma olen selline inimene, kellega saab rääkida ükskõik millest. Absoluutselt kõigest.
Juhuks kui keegi tahab rääkida, siis mu MSN on kaarel29@hot.ee

Come undone

I am not so sure in myself anymore. I can clearly see, that I've become ignorant and stubborn. I can read it from my mind. I don't want to be like that.
Yet, everything is quite about perfect, so i have no idea why I am so depressed all the time. What more can I wish, if i have everything? I have the world, but that doesn't change anything.
The world inside me is still the same. It will corrupt me if i don't stand against it. I don't mean that it would make me "evil", just that it could hold me back. Could stop me from being free.
I feel that I've been imprisoned by myself.
I feel cut up inside.

The happiness of existence... or something

As the heading suggests, i really am happy. I have almost everything that i want. Some of those things i've wanted for so long..
I'm even doing well at school. If anyone needs help, then just ask.
Once again i have no clue of what to write, so i'll just put down some facts:
Favourite band: The Used
Favourite song: Listening(live, by The Used)
Favourite haircut: Hard to describe, but it's what you see when i have short hair.
Religion: Agnostic(prove it and i believe)
Philosophy: Altruism(of social philosophy)

Okay, now i have a little idea.
I like to think that i'm very selfless. I do things to help others without expecting anything in return. I do it because i want to.
I am unsocial if there's more than 3 people around. At least usually. Some people count as more than 1, some don't at all.
It's very difficult to annoy or bore me. For a year only 2 people have made me angry. Although more have made me upset, but that's not the same.
I am an increasingly fast learner. It usually takes little effort for me to learn new things.
However, i'm lazy, so it balances out.
I've only recently started to use emotes at a normal rate, i used to put all emotions into text. I do not regret it.
I'm a generator of ideas. It can sometimes make me boring, as the constant flow of ideas can quickly trash people's minds.

Because of music

Hello,

It seems that my little blog is coming back to life after that long time. So now i want to post again, to keep it going. 

Some stuff that i've been working on:

This is a WIP picture of a map i'm gonna make. This place will have it's point, but i won't tell what just yet. 

Also, this song is really good in my opinion:

Farewell
/Xonok the Endorian, not so lost anymore

Once again about writing

I'm constantly wondering about publishing. It's not that i had anything to publish, i just want to know what would be the best way of doing that. Once i think i'm ready.
So yesterday i made an account on booksie. Here's my bio that i put there:

I have little idea of who i am, but i guess everyone else knows even less of me. So here it goes.
I am a precocious(Is that how it's said? Or should i say early?) person. People consider me smart. I consider myself lazy.
I am always looking for new friends. Especially those that don't like themselves. I believe that self-criticism is a very good sign about one's personality.
My blog probably tells a lot more about how i think, so i'll just skip to the writing part.
I started to write quite accidentially. Sometimes i just get that certain feeling. It stops me from sleeping or doing anything else, until i wait it out or write.
My first stories were about the history of certain fictional races. I can show them if anyone wishes to see.
I write in a mix of english and estonian. After that i create 2 versions of each story(if i bother)- english and estonian. Hopefully both equally good.
Now i am writing fantasy and science fiction. Currently the favorite character that i've created is called Martin Overmoon.
I think i'm a bit off. I'll update this bio when i find a better time. Currently i'm getting distracted.
P.S That picture of me is old.

You can look it up yourself: www.booksie.com/Xonok