Follow-up: Hope?

Perhaps the reason I feel so powerless is that I am on the edge of my capabilities? It would explain everything that I can think of in this moment.
Perhaps I am simply so stressed out that I no longer know how to lie down and relax? It simply makes sense now...

Exhaustion washes over me. I feel somewhat worse, but at least the pain is gone. It's as if I was slumbering towards death...

Finding reason in my life once again. Just like I've done many times...

Some people always wish to judge. The point of their life is, apparently, to quantify and qualify. To such people it is painful to not know something, because it gives them no chance to judge.
Am I like this? Sometimes I feel like I contain everything that I hate, so it might be so. Yet, I do not see how it would apply in this case. Maybe eventually I will(?)

Being everything to everyone is so messy...(me)

Sometimes challenges are the best teachers. This can never be seen by those who don't undertake them.

I tried to find myself through finding others. I didn't actually realize back then, that it's not to be done like that. We are defined by those around us, whether we want it or not.

Why did I give myself up? Why have I been giving myself up for all this time? I used to be a cheerful little child. Little of it is left and now I see that I changed away from it slowly, but surely. Why did I think it better to change towards the worse?

Some things are much easier to see when you don't have them.

Practice stupidity or you won't know how to avoid it.

In search of others I almost lost myself. I did not know who I am and thus, was never really able to understand anyone else either. However, I have now looked over my blog and realized, that the answer had been under my nose all along.
I changed, because I wanted to understand others. In doing so, I turned colder and showed out less. This is why I am like I am.
It was so easy, I just didn't know it.

I started writing this post right after the previous. Yet, I now know so much that I didn't know just a few hours into the past.